Archive for the ‘healing’ Category

Divorce is NEVER The End

So, why do those of us who become divorced think it is? Maybe it’s because we become comfortable with what we have, Maybe because we’re afraid of what’s on the other side of that door…
Maybe we just like it here.

 

6 years ago… After my divorce,  if you asked me where I’d be right now, I’d never in a million years say HERE.

 
But, I am…and if this is what The End looks like, I love it!
Divorce Dazed is not the first divorce writing I’ve done, I had a column back at home (in Connecticut where I am from) and there I wrote about how I worked through the process. Divorce Dazed was born later, when I had the desire to share with others what I learned from it, how to laugh about it, and what to do after it. I’ve been blogging as a whole since October 2010  and at some point along the way, my ability to write and relate to others has grown into 2 more blogsa parenting column in a magazine and now a business.
At this point, my divorce has become one of the greatest blessings in my life… 
but on that note, it’s also time for more change.
I’ve accomplished a lot since my divorce and now I’m working on some other goals, like focusing on my flourishing business and my parenting book… so my divorce blogging ‘daze’ will have to take a back seat.
There are 160 posts for you to choose from on Divorce Dazed, and if you’re going through a divorce or preparing for one, use the search bar to find some priceless pieces of advice. And… if you’re interested in following me on the rest of my journey of the brokenclick here… because like I’ve always said:

 ~ LIFE GOES ON ~

BE INSPIRED BY THIS BLOG,  BY YOUR DIVORCE &

BY YOUR FUTURE.

I am…

If you follow the instructions,
it will feel like you are walking off a cliff…
Do it anyway, 
it’s worth the ride.

 

 

There was a death in my family recently.
I had to travel out of state for it,
 so I spent a lot of time in the car.
It gave me time to think…
The death was difficult for me
and brought up a lot of memories
(both good and bad).
It led me to remember where I came from,
how I got here,
and everything which happened in between.
And, for a while, I felt sad and sorry for all those bumps in the road….
but, then I realized…
They all led me
here,
and ‘here’ is where I’m supposed to be.
You’re divorce is part of your destiny; you cannot change it,
but you can be grateful for it.
Today, make a list of at least 3 amazing reasons why you are divorced (or on the broken road).
 
Here are my 3 amazing reasons for the broken roads in my life:
1) My 3 Beautiful Children
2 ) The Woman/Parent I Have Become
3) My Amazing New Husband
 

 

 


TRUE:
Divorce is the end of our marriage,
 and a chapter in our lives,
But, it doesn’t have to be the end of our world,
our life,
or our happiness!
TRUE:
‘Nobody can go back and start a new beginning…

but
Anyone can start today and make a new ending.’
-Maria Robinson
LET GO OF YOUR OLD STORY,
AND REWRITE A NEW ONE WITH A MAGNIFICENT ENDING!
TODAY!!!!
I know from experience, it’s impossible to heal on our own power, alone.This blog post, written by a fellow blogger, says it so much better:
‘Once we make the decision to allow God to heal, 
He begins to show you the reasons you are hurting.  
Just because He showed me the thing that…’

 

I bet you didn’t.

Unless you got onto that topic of conversation, of course.

Well, I did, and was surprised when he told me.

But should I have been?

Because supposedly, one in every two marriages ends in divorce, and according to a study I read on divorce by country, 4.95 people per thousand are divorced in America.

I completely believe divorce is just one of those things that’s going to be around for as long as mistakes are….not that I like it…because I don’t…but I grew up with it, did it, and well…

This is my thought:

Considering errors have been in existence for (oh, let’s say) forever…I’m afraid that divorce isn’t going anywhere. (Unless our government decides to take that freedom away from us too.)

Truths:


We are human,
imperfect,
broken,
and at the mercy of a powerful driving force which is not always looking our for us; our brain.

The Craziness:
Love…and our powerhouse of a mind…
Yes, that’s right, our deep desires, our incredible love for acceptance and affection… our own ability to justify, accept, and deny problems…all actions which can lead to mistakes. Sometimes, mistakes in love.

We don’t do it because we want divorce…on the contrary, we do it because we have hope…


Another part of human nature…

Sometimes it seems impossible to appreciate lost love…
 But I learned a long time ago from a good friend,
that we need to appreciate all things
which happen to us;
 even the bad ones.
and 
‘Don’t cry because it’s over, smile because it happened.”
~ Dr. Seuss
Today make a list of ten good things that came out of your Divorce.


Come on…I know you can do it.

If I can, you can:
My 10 Good Things:

1. My 3 amazing children
2. My new life and career
3. My stronger sense of self
4. Our many years of fun and freedom when young love was simple and easy
5. The fact that my ‘X’ taught me to order something different off the menu every time I eat out
6. 2 years of being a stay at home Mom (probably the most priceless experience besides giving birth)
7. My amazing 2nd husband
8. My renewed trust in God
9. Increased inner strength, self confidence and self respect
10. The ability to help better educate my children on ‘life’

Someone else once said to me that ‘Nothing is a loss’…