Last year, when I started Divorce Dazed, it was the last of the babies born to
my collection of blogs, and as it reaches it’s first anniversary, I’m evaluating it, and its content, just as I’ve done with the others.Some have asked me why I glorify divorce, others wonder why I want to stay stuck in the past by continuing to write about my divorce….and…why I wouldn’t just want to get on with my life?
Well, first let me start by saying that if you’ve ever been divorced with children, you’d know that there is no easy way of ‘forgetting my divorce’ and ‘getting on with life’. It will always be a part of my life for as long as I am alive. But, with that being said, it’s been six years since the ink dried on my decree (seven if you count the separation and legal procedures) and I have to say that I think I’ve pretty much moved on. I’ve grown a lot since then. I don’t blame anyone for my marriage ending, I like and accept who I am, I am independent, decided to relocate 600 miles away from my home state to begin my life over, and have continued to raise my children well. They are happy and healthy and our home life is very stable and loving.
Recently, I even got re-married, (not that re-marrying indicates healing, because it doesn’t: read more), but I think it’s safe to say:
I’m over it.
Secondly, anyone who reads my
DD Disclaimer knows that
my mission never is to encourage those in ‘difficult’ marriages to separate.
Divorce is a personal choice, and unless it’s absolutely necessary, you should stay married to your spouse, stick it out, and seek help.
Unfortunately, though, in some cases even after working to repair the marriage, it’s still necessary for divorce. Divorce is not inevitable, but it does happen, and will continue to as long as it is a legal right. (I give it about fifteen to twenty more years before it’s at risk of being challenged.)
I began
Divorced Dazed, because I was painfully aware that there’s not much out there for divorce support other than lot’s of p-o’d people cussing about their ‘X’s, and too many websites offering nasty legal advice.
If you follow my blog, you know I’m not dwelling, complaining or staying stuck in the past…I write to help put things into perspective for those encountering their divorce ‘daze’.
I thought ten years of being married was a feat. I was proud of that, and I hated to give it up by divorcing my husband, but it was clear, that after that many years together, the depth of our relationship was just not there like it should be. I’m afraid it never was, because now with my current husband I have what I thought marriage should have been like all along, and in a short amount of time.
Like comparing the quality of my first ten years of marriage with my ‘X’, to my short second marriage; quantity did not mean quality.
That goes for this blog as well.
As ten years of marriage does not equal a healthy relationship, three blog posts a week does not mean great information. I’ve decided to better service Divorce Dazed readers decreasing the quantity of weekly posts from three, to one. Monday’s posts will now have deeper topics, more guidance, and exercises, to help you with your life transition. With this change, I hope it leaves readers feeling more empowered with motivation and inspiration than ever before, and just like divorce: It’s not the end, it’s just a new beginning.
Thank you for supporting Divorce Dazed and I hope you will evolve with me.
Feel free to share your thoughts and suggest topics which are important to you.
See you next Monday!
Divorce Dazed 